Day Five...

I kept to myself this morning. I knew Andy would not want to leave Deb and Ryan to go surfing. I stayed in my room, waited, and read. Finally, I decided to walk to the little Colmado at the top of the hill to get something to eat.

As I walked up the steep hill, I noticed the sky was cloudy. I grabbed something from the bakery and walked back. The place was still quiet. I decided to walk to Domes. I knew it would be a long walk, but I didn't care. If I can bike for miles and miles, I can walk the three or or four miles there and back. I wanted to make sure there were no waves.

The first thing I saw, as I neared the top of the hill, was a woman, about thirty-five, walking just ahead in shorts and a tank top. She carried a gas can in one hand and a hammer in the other. She was talking, pointing to someone up ahead, and she was pissed. She kept mumbling something about someone stealing her stuff, while inserting the F bomb in between every other word.

When she got to the top of the hill, she began yelling at two guys parked at the top. That was when I really started getting nervous. I was only a few paces behind her. What if she was insane, and started coming after me? I started wondering how fast I could actually run in sandals.

She told them she was going to take that f-ing hammer and smash it right into their f-ing skulls if they didn't give her her cigarettes back. She was holding the hammer up, waving it in the air, grunting, "Huh? Huh?" I saw the younger guy run around behind the car and disappear down the hill. That was when I took the opportunity to quietly slip off down the hill to the right and practice my speed walking.

It was quiet after that, and I took my time, passing the tightly positioned, brightly colored houses with sleeping dogs that for the most part ignored me. Before long, I could see the aquamarine sea, and up ahead a family of horses grazing near the side of the road. One of them had a long rope dragging behind ... evidence of her overnight escape, perhaps. She let me pet her, and it was such fun, looking at her up close. Funny how she seemed to nestle her cheek right into my hand. I continued down to Maria's, and when I turned around, there was the horse, following me! I petted her again, and then they all trotted off down a side road.

I saw two roadies ride past as I trekked along the shady path, on my way to Indicators. What a relief to see the surf was small, about a foot. I was so glad to see that it had dropped, and that we were not missing anything. I continued on to Domes. No one was out at all, it looked nearly flat. I stopped at the whale watch tower, but the sea was calm. Nothing broke the water's surface for as far as I could see.

The walk back was harder, up the steep hill all the way. It felt good, though. When I got back, the house was quiet and still.

I read some more. I feel suddenly, somehow, lonely. I remembered those times when Colby was young, and we went on trips as a family, and all the fun we had. I heard soft giggling, and realized Andy and Ryan were on the porch playing Uno. I had that once. My time for this has passed. It is their time. I realize that I want to travel as much as I can, now. I want to gather as many memories as I can, for later, to keep me warm in the days that lie ahead...

Eventually I go out on the porch, and Ryan asks me to join in the game. I don't want to intrude. I'll watch for a while, I say. Soon we are all laughing together. The game is fun. Every now and then, he mentions the cat and looks sad. Kids are so resilient.

The sky is blue, the breeze is perfect. We end up flicking pistachio shells off the porch ledge in a game of "Pistachio Putt-Putt." Ryan is delighted with this, and tells us to "Eat! Eat!" as Andy and I become the factory that makes the shells for the game. To get a point, you make it inside the fronds of the glossy bayonet plants below. Ryan is nearly hysterical now. We finally decide to go snorkel, get outside. Andy tells Deb it will make her feel better.

We trundle on down to "Steps." Andy and Ryan head out into the water, and soon a light rain shower begins. I stay with Deb, up by the car. We talk for about an hour, about everything.

We have to go to these places, these dark depths of despair. Otherwise, how will we ever recognize the shimmering high points? They would never mean as much.

Ryan runs up to us, "It is beautiful!" he is saying, the brain coral, the fish! He saw a turtle! Andy says that snorkeling with Ryan is more fun than even surfing. That says everything.

As afternoon is waning, we go to Domes. Surprise of surprises, the surf is coming up. Andy and I end up paddling out for an evening session of glassy peelers, chest high, while Deb and Ryan build caves and tunnels for the crabs on the beach. Later, we eat dinner at "Bambino's," a tasty Italian place we found. It is good, but Deb doesn't have much of an appetite.

Back to our place, Andy, Ryan, and I watch a movie together. Deb just isn't in the mood. After an hour, I look over to see Andy and Ryan asleep, intertwined on the couch together. Deb comes out, and we smile, just watching them...