Am I ready for the biggest surf of my life? NO

As I stood on the beach that first evening, I realized that some people might look at these waves I stared at as the best of luck. I have lost my job, and have little prospects at the moment. I shouldn't even be here. My life is just insane at the moment. But, look at the surf, will you?

How I got here doesn't matter. What does is that these are the biggest waves I have ever seen in my entire life in the flesh. My heart sinks. My confidence couldn't be any lower than it is at this point in time. I do not relish paddling out in this tomorrow. It is too insane to consider at this moment. There are so many reasons why we can't go out right now. We have to get set up at our place, get supplies, do this and that. Good. I do not want to go out here right now. It looks like it is forty feet out there.

No one is out, not one single person, anywhere we look. That tells you something, Andy says. But, what excuse will I have tomorrow? I feel sick at this moment. I just want a wave that won't kill me.

The next morning, we walk out. Good God. I was surprised the beach wasn't shaking. It looks a little smaller, Andy says. Are you kidding me?

We decide to look at the cabinas. Glenn says he will meet us there. When we get there, I just want to cry. Huge, glassy, green walls are heaving like buildings toppling over in slow motion. Glenn tells us about a guy who paddled straight out here, recently, with a new board and never got one wave. Snap! Down came the lip, and that was that. I was picturing my spine snapping as I watched another one rise up and bomb into a moutain of white water. Gulp. Andy actually wanted to paddle out. Respect!

I talked him down as we watched one of four super human or insane types bobbing outside like specks of dust in the universe. Oh my God, he is going for one... holy crap, he is taking off! We watch as he makes it and slides to the bottom, the thing four times over his head! I am twisting and squirming, did you see that? I am babbling. Glenn and Andy are speechless. One guy walks up, panting. Glenn says, as an aside, "Hey, he's a good surfer... what happened?" He says, "I got halfway out there and then came to my senses." We decide to go back and wait for a different tide, or day, or something, yeah. Waiting is good, thank you.

Okay, so we didn't surf those first two days.

No shame in that. No one was out anywhere except at wimpy Jaco, where it is 1/8th the size.

So, today dawned and I knew we would have to paddle out. That's what we came for.

Luckily, we went to Puntarenas. "Second best left point break in the world," a sign says by the $2.00 shower sign.

It looked about 3-5 ft. plus out there. I sighed with relief. There were still some bombing sets, but nothing compared to Hermosa, thank you. We headed for the cliffs, after paddling through the murky "croc" river, as Glenn called it. Glenn chickens out along the skinny path, the cliff steep and scary. He said he was afraid of heights. "WTF?" Andy said. "He drops in the biggest waves around here, and he can't be up here?" That path was narrow, and I was nervous, too. But, look at those lefts peeling off! There are only four people out. Am I dreaming?

We paddle out, and I catch one right away, a pretty good size one, overhead and clean. I race it, steep and fast. I almost make it to the inside, but the whole thing heaves and I bail. Stoked! There is so much time inbetween waves it doesn't matter.

Andy moves inside and is hooting, catching a bunch that are peeling off like clockwork. Glenn in snagging big ones, overhead, smiling the whole way. I am getting a little frustrated. I want a big one, but I am having trouble reading the waves. They start to break, and I back out, thinking they are going to close on me. It is hard to adjust to a peeling wave after the waves we get at home. Then it happens. There could have been no better time for it. My wave of the day.

I see the horizon go dark, and see the long line. It's a big one. I move a bit inside and over, realizing the trick, how it shifts. I am paddling hard, it is heaving, and I am almost too late. I am not backing out, and I jump to my feet at it throws out. I can only tuck inside, pig dog style, to make it.

And, then came joy.

The lip threw over and I set my line, just slightly pumping inside, on one of the best tubes I have ever had in my life. The lip just kept unfolding over me, again and again. It was ridiculous, and beyond belief. I saw the guy on the green board looking in at me, then the ripper kid, then Glenn down the line, hooting his head off! I kept in it past them, down the line, for so long. I kept thinking it was going to end, but it just keeps looping over and over the farther I moved inside. Then I just started laughing because it was beyond insane. I did some weird move that shot me out on the face and I saw Glenn grinning from ear to ear. "I think you were inside that wave for at least 20 seconds!" He laughed. I was shaking all over in disbelief, a happiness inside that words could never convey.

I paddled past the guy on the green board and he was looking at me, grinning, and said, "That was crazy!" I said I had been having a crap session until that wave. He said, "Well, you sure turned THAT around!"

When we got back and took out the boards, Andy noticed I had put my fins in all wrong. I put the big ones in the back and the small ones in the front. I just started laughing all over again. Andy just smiled, shook his head, and started putting them in for me.

How do I get through life? With a little help from my friends.